So in recent months, a situation happened in my sister’s circle. So she found out that one of her closest friends decided to get acquainted with our brother. Now for me, I honestly do not care but hearing my sister speak on it, obviously this affects her in a way. Well, you know my saying, I had to write about it. I sat and spoke to some of my friends on their definition of Girl Code. Let’s just say some of the things we agreed on & others not so much. My definition of Girl Code is:
Girl Code– Some code guidelines that women must take into consideration in their circle in order to stay with their group of friends.
Pretty simple right?………..WRONG!!!!!!!!!! And I am going to tell you why. What are the guidelines? Every group has different ones. So trust me I may or may not have broken some.
Some girl codes may say sleeping with a friends brother is not okay. Have I slept with a close friends brother? Yes, yes I have. Does my friend know this? No, no she doesn’t & she never will know. Lord, I bet all my friends with brothers are wondering, who am I talking about. That my friends don’t even matter the point is you will never know about it. So with a good sound mind and body, my friends and I came up with the GIRL CODE COMMANDMENTS
- IF THOU IS NOT MY FRIEND, THOU SHALL NOT KNOW MY PERSONAL BUSINESS
- THOU SHALL NOT DATE SOMEONE THAT YOUR FRIEND OR FAMILY HAS HAD AFFAIRS WITH
- THOU SHALL CALL YOUR FRIEND OUT WHEN SHE’S WRONG. EVEN IF ITS UPSETS HER
- THOU SHALL NOT BETRAY A FRIENDS TRUST. WHAT I SAY TO YOU MUST REMAIN BETWEEN ME AND YOU
- IF THOU HAS LAIN WITH MY MAN IN THE PAST, THOU HAS AN OBLIGATION TO LET IT BE KNOWN
- THOU SHALL NOT DISCUSS FRIEND WITH THEIR ENEMIES
- IF THOU HAS WENT TO THE CLUB TOGETHER, THOU SHALL LEAVE TOGETHER
- THOU SHALL NEVER LET FRIEND GO TO THE BATHROOM ALONE WHILE PARTYING
- IF THOU GAIN LEGIT INFORMATION, THOU SHALL NEVER TELL WHO YOUR SOURCES ARE
- THOU SHALL ALWAYS WAIT TILL FRIEND IS IN THE HOUSE BEFORE LEAVING. OR IF FRIEND DRIVES MAKE SURE SHE TEXT YOU SHE MADE IT HOME.
- IF FRIEND ASK HOW SHE LOOKS, THOU HAS THE RIGHT, TO TELL THE TRUTH.
- THOUS SHOULD ALWAYS SUPPORT A FRIENDS DREAMS, GOALS AND PLANS ANY WAY YOU CAN
- THOU SHALL NOT LET FRIENDS WALK OUT THE HOUSE WITH CRAP ON HER FACE OR IN HER TEETH
- IF THOU IS NOT FRIENDS ANY MORE, SECRETS SHALL BE TOOK TO THE GRAVE
- IF THOU IS IN A RELATIONSHIP, YOUR BOYFRIEND SHALL NOT KNOW FRIENDS BUSINESS
- THOU SHALL BE ABLE TO TALK TO HER GIRLS WITH NO JUDGEMENT
- THOU SHALL CHECK ON FRIENDS AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK OR TWO.
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY
THOU SHALL NEVER EVER HATE ON HER FRIENDS SUCCESS.
Comment below and tell me what girl codes your group of friends has.
Just this past week hip hop suffered a horrible and I mean horrible blow. Rapper Nipsey Hussle past away. When I say I was so hurt, I felt like a brother passed away. The sad part was just that this past Saturday, I was watching his GQ interview with his wife Lauren London & his tidal concert. Till this day as I am writing this blog, I still feel sad and hurt to the core. And to be honest with you, I kinda don’t know why. I won’t say that I was a “super fan” but I was a fan. I remember my homie “Q” & I was talking about music a couple of years back & he put me on Nipsey. Ever since then, I was listening to his music. I like how his voice was so different than the others & he had the real west coast accent. But when Victory lap came out, I felt like that was his best work. Not only I was a fan of his music but I loved how we spoke positivity in his community. Instead of getting a couple of million & leaving his neighborhood, he legit planted a seed in Crenshaw & let it flourished. You know how some rappers want to buy the neighborhood, this man really did that. He wanted the kids to get a feel of silicon valley and their learnings and teachings. When I found out about his death I literally cried like he was one of the close family members. I was so shocked like “why would someone do this, he seemed like a cool dude”. I became numb because this man was at the height of his career & was just getting started. I even heard that he was creating a joint album with Meek Mill that I know would’ve been a hit. I just knew that we suffered a huge loss in the world. He talked about flourishing black businesses. And also buying your neighborhood and bring up the generation behind you.
What really makes me upset is with the comments black people are saying why are we so sad or what makes him better than others. To be honest every senseless death is sad no matter if you a Grammy-nominated an artist or a college grad. But tearing someone’s death down doesn’t make it any better. It is okay to show sadness for someone you don’t know. I have noticed the same people who are asking why are we crying over someone we don’t know is the same ones who ask for prayer for their families. But hearing why he died really makes me scared & angrier. He was killed by a man in the community he was trying to help… PERIODT. No government conspiracy or anything of that nature, he was killed by an evil hating person. Now if you want to believe it was the government then that’s your choice, but is it conspiracy about the killings in our own backyard? To be honest, I am actually scared. Scared to be successful & come back to my old hood. Hell, I don’t have a lot of money now & I am scared to go back. For this reason right here & Lil Boosie said it best, some people would be mad & angry that you made it out. That you made something work for you, just because we were in the same class doesn’t mean you have the same mentality or hustle as me. I heard someone say sometimes we cut the nose off to save our face a little bit too quickly. This coward killed one of the only people who gave a damn about the community. And for that, I pray the community does not suffer.
Not want to dwell on his death but let’s look at what he taught us in these 33 years of life he had. He taught us about telling your story. He always spoke on what goes on in his neighborhood. Not to glorify it but to show what he made it out of. He taught about real estate, having real estate will gain more than anything else could ever. He taught about family, every business he has he shares it with his family Finally, he taught that your legacy will live on after you are gone.
Look at what you’re doing now. When you leave this earth, what do you want to leave. What do you want to be known for. That right there alone makes me want to push my writing & give my son something not materialistic. Also this has really taught me to really appreciate the people around you. You know what ones who supports you & wants the best for you.
I was a shorty when Pac & Biggie died. I always wondered why these people was crying, sadly I understand.
Comment below and let me know how Nipsey inspired you and how what legacy you want to leave.